There you are and here I am.
We are separated by oceans, by streets, by minutes, by miles.
If there were a bridge, I'd cross it.
For a chat, for a meal, for a moment.

You are my family and my friends, my constants and confidantes.
You know me best, you love me even at my worst.
If there were a bridge, I'd cross it.
In a car, on foot, on a bike I don't know how to ride.

This pandemic has made miles longer, distance farther.
From family abroad and family down the street.
If there were a bridge, I'd be on it.
In a heartbeat, in a flash, in an instant.

I could, but I'm scared.
I could, but I'd worry
I could, but I'm afraid.
To risk and put you at risk.

If there were a bridge, I'd cross it.
In an instant, for a moment, on foot.

Today.

The plan wasn’t to walk these streets alone.  Paris isn’t meant to be seen alone.  Especially for your first time.

It was meant to be a sisters’ trip.  We had never done one before.  Where it’s just the three of us.  No brothers to annoy us, no kids to pester us, no parents to take care of and no friends to distract us.  Just three sisters seeing, smelling and savoring the sights. 

But alas it was not meant to be. Shortly after we decided on the month, my younger sister backed out. And then one month before the trip, my other sister had to cancel too.  So it was just me.  Should I push through?

Aside from being a sisters trip, this was also supposed to be a “things to do before I’m 40” trip.  (Yes it was that long ago).  Ticking off the “go to Europe” and “travel alone” items.  I was going to spend two weeks with my sisters then stay an extra few days to travel by myself, with myself.

But fate seems to have conspired against me…or did it? 

Everything had all been planned out, I had filed for my vacation leave, gotten my visa, booked my hotels and basically prepared myself emotionally and financially for my journey so I decided, what the hell? 

So I packed my bags, filled it with cup noodles, easy open liver pate, skyflakes, plastic forks and even disposable plastic containers.  (Did I mention it was a budget trip?) And I was off…

First stop: PARIS.  I stepped out of the airport and inhaled and smiled.  I’m here.  Not the way I originally planned but damn it, I’m here. 

As I entered my tiny hotel room, I laughed.  You really do get what you pay for.  A narrow room with a single bed, a small desk and a tiny closet.  And two doors at the end of the room.  One door opened to a small shower, with just a small shelf to put your toiletries and a hook for your towel, while the other revealed a toilet and a sink, not bad, I thought, except that sloping ceiling above the toilet meant I’d have to be a bit creative.

After a quick shower and unpacking of a few necessities, it was time to start my Parisian adventure. 

First on the agenda was a Seine Cruise Tour. I was told that watching the sunset from the boat would be amazing.  So I got my ticket and waited with bated breath for the tour to start and for dusk to settle.  But as the tour began and I had my first taste of this beautiful city, a part of me wondered, when is the sun going to set?  It took me a while to realize that in August, in Paris, sunset would not happen until 9pm.  By then I’d be done with the tour and back in my hotel room, eating my cup noodles. 

This trip really was not turning out the way it was planned.  But hey, I’m in freaking Paris.  And I was looking forward to what tomorrow would bring and what the rest of the trip would be.

So on my first night in Paris, sitting in my hotel room, enjoying my Nissin’s Yakisoba and my Skyflakes and the Diet Coke from the convenience store up the street, I smiled. I’m safe and happy and feeling proud that I’m not freaking out. 

The plan wasn’t to walk the streets of Paris alone, but I’m here.  And damn if I wasn’t going to make the best of it.

I’ve said it several times on this blog but this time, I hope it’s for keeps.  I’ve decided to restart the Adventures of Inday though most of them have happened, thanks to the pandemic, in the confines of my bedroom/home office or in those short escapes and mini-road trips. 

A few months ago, I started taking a writing class.  I have spent most of my professional life writing for work but I’ve missed writing for fun, writing for me.  So as part of this season’s reboot, I will start posting some of what I think are my “greatest hits” from class.  And eventually start posting regularly random thoughts and WTF’s again. 

Hope you’ll enjoy Inday’s return and our shared thoughts.

There’s this facebook status/post that’s gone viral about being plus size in the Philippines. After reading it, I could totally relate to it. There is just something about being fat in the Philippines. Here’s my version…

I am fat.

There I said it. No ifs ands or buts. I am fat.

That doesn’t mean I can’t be pretty or I can’t be sexy.

It just means that I am not a size 0, I am heavier than the average person, and I’ll need a bit more space on the bench.

And, you don’t have to point it out to me. I know it. I’ve known it all my life.

I am fat.

I’ve been on every fad diet, I’ve tried Weight Watchers, Nutri-System, Fit for Life, Atkins, Scarsdale, South Beach and though some of them have worked, eventually I just go back to what I truly am…FAT

And that’s ok.

It doesn’t mean I won’t try to lose the weight, it just means I won’t feel horrible if I don’t. I won’t feel ugly if I only lose 5 and not 50 pounds. I won’t feel like I’m a failure if I never become a size 2. I’m just happy fitting into the clothes I have now.

As long as I am healthy, I am not at risk for sudden death or my knees aren’t buckling because of the weight.

You don’t have to feel sorry for me. “Maganda ka sana, kaya lang mataba ka.” You don’t have to look down on me. “Maganda ka sana, kaya lang mataba ka.” You don’t have to think less of me. “Maganda ka sana, kaya lang mataba ka.” No need to stare, point fingers or laugh, “Maganda ka sana, kaya lang mataba ka.”

And though I am fat, I am so much more than that. I am a daughter, sister, aunt, ninang, tita, friend, neighbor. I am a former fim production slave, a band manager and a writer who now co-owns an Events Company and, along with my friends Ben and Aimee, am now a vlogger (please subscribe to The Truets vlog on youtube, visit https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1To1O_Fas1dBEUSM2fjVDQ). And, I am a doggie mom to Jose Cuervo Quiogue aka Cuervo.

And yes I am fat, but surely I have so many other traits and characteristics that you can use to describe me.   You can say I’m pretty, cute, loud, masungit, mataray, madaldal, maarte…Because I am so much more than just FAT.

So yes I am fat, but that’s not all I am.

I grew up in a family of dog lovers, well except for my mom. There was always a dog in our household.

The Quiogs or The Quiogue Dogs

For years, I was happy being the doggie ninang who visits once in a while, takes the dogs out for occasional walk, and then I’d leave and go back to my dogless life.

Until I met Jose Cuervo Quiogue.

When I moved into my own place, my sister suggested I get a dog. I thought why not? So after months of research, I decided on a Bichon Frise. I was doing the next phase of my research—where to get one. So far I had found breeders online, but wasn’t really sure how to go about checking if these were legit etc.

Then one night in September 2015, while we were at my place for a late night work session, my friend Aimee asked me, “What kind of dog did you want again?” Turns out someone she knew had puppies for sale, and they were Bichons!! She actually had one puppy left! And the next day we were on our way to pick-up the dog.

It was love at first sight.

The day we met

From the moment I carried him and he burrowed into my neck, I was a goner. This little guy had won my heart. From the breeder’s house we went to buy supplies including a doggie bed. I told myself that I would have him sleep on his bed and not on mine. Ha! I didn’t even last the night.

Not just on my bed, but on my pillow!

And then it begins…

We noticed that he would always be shaking his head, as if saying no. It almost looked like he had the head tremors of Parkinson’s. At first I thought it was just a twitch or something, but I figured, better safe than sorry. So I brought him to the vet who said that his nerves were underdeveloped and he was given a supplement. After a couple of months, the head shaking subsided and now it only happens when he was experiencing heightened emotion-anger, excitement etc.

But that wasn’t all.

One night I found him with a piece of cotton in his mouth. When I checked, it was cotton with dried nail polish remover. I, of course, freaked out and brought him to the ER, yes there is a Pet Emergency Room that charges you P2,500 just for walking in the door. They took an X-ray and though they saw that he had not ingested the cotton, they also saw that his heart was abnormally shaped. Instead of the usual mango-like shape, Cuervo’s was round. I decided to get a second opinion and he was diagnosed with Arrythmia and given heart supplements. His diet was also changed from packaged snacks to fruits and vegetables.   And so began another round of research–finding out what he can and cannot eat.

Cuervo with his bowl of fruit

It doesn’t end there.

I would first order from Whole Pet Kitchen, who developed a recipe especially for him that took into consideration all of Cuervo’s medical issues. Due to some incidents (I will not go into detail hehe), Cuervo was also found to have a tendency for hyperacidity. So we were told to give him smaller and more frequent meals instead of just the twice daily.   The vet also told us to feed him chicken broth and rice during his attacks.  And that’s when I discovered my dog loves soup or any liquid with flavor.  So now we do soup and rice meals or fruit shakes (yes fruit shakes) for his snacks.

In short, I have a dog with arrythmia, hyperacidity, a nerve disorder who’s a spoiled brat, loves yellow watermelon, likes soup and fruit shakes.   He loves to go on car rides (tho I think it’s more cause he has separation anxiety and doesn’t want to be left at home).

in the car with mommy

He loves it when I sing to him (his favorite songs are Adele’s All I Ask and Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas). When he’s stressed, I dance with him (parang baby lang).   We have our nightly hair brushing sessions.

He gets really mad if you take off his leash and he feels he hasn’t had enough pasyal yet.

And, I video chat with I’m away and he seems to listen (hahaha).

As you can see, I can go on and on and on and on about Cuervo. (which I’ve done) but I can’t help it. We are the perfect fit.  The defective dog and the dysfunctional doggie mom.

As I said, it was love at first sight.

That’s all for now…bow.

P.S. Check out his instagram page @josecuervoq

My friends and I watched Ang Dalawang Mrs. Reyes. We had heard how funny and entertaining it was and we were looking forward to seeing it. Yes it was funny, some scenes were even hilarious. Judy Ann was, as always, amazing. And Angelica Panganiban was a gem. The guys were pretty good too.

So the casting was great, the lines were funny, the production design was good.

What bothered me was the story.

Yes, hooray for self-discovery and finding your soulmate and all that. But at the end of the day these two men CHEATED on their wives, BROKE THEIR VOWS, which I think we can assume were said in church in front of God and basically lied to everyone around them…FOR YEARS!!

Judy Ann’s character had every right to be angry and hurt and feel betrayed. And damn it she had every right to post it on her social media account. Her husband of 15 years lied to her and was basically lying to her for a long time.

While the film celebrates gay marriage and finding love, it also minimizes all the pain that comes with betrayal and separation and infidelity.

To me, the film made Judy Ann and Angelica look like these vindictive women who wouldn’t let their husbands find happiness, AND why not? They had a right to be those women.   Especially cause there seemed to be no remorse from the men. Yes everyone can come out as happy and well-adjusted in the end, but 2 days after the bomb exploded, there’s still going to be some fall-out.

Yes it’s a comedy, and am probably not supposed to take it all so seriously. But, it’s a comedy that chose to deal with such a sensitive subject so they should also have been more sensitive about all angles of the story and the message that they are sending out.

That’s all for now….bow.

Haven’t written one of these in a while. But since we’re back in this blog business then WTH right? This entry can also be called fb status messages that I considered posting but for some reason decided not too.

WHAT THE RIMOWA?

Apparently the PAL ground staff in Manila have a special policy regarding RIMOWA suitcases. They are treated as “SPECIAL HANDLING” and are not put on the conveyor with the other bags. Instead they are “picked up” by the baggage handlers from the check-in counter. When asked why, the ground staff said “Because the owners complain.”  E di ba nga “indestructible”?  ‘WOW SPECIAL. NAHIYA NAMAN ANG SAMSONITE KO. SENSYA.

ENGLISH ONLY, PLEASE!!!

Who writes the subtitles for Tagalog movies? It really bothers me when I see that the subtitles are badly written. They don’t have to be direct translations but they should at least make sense right? And then how come sometimes the character’s lines are in English and yet the English subtitles are wrong??? KOKOPYAHIN MO NA LANG DI BA?

PETMALU#$%@#$@%@$#@$

Every time I see someone post or hear anyone say “petmalu” or “lodi”, I cringe. We already did that whole reversing the words thing in the 70s-ermats, erpats etc. And those words had some charm. Plus if you’re going to do this, then the least you can do is do it right. It’s not LO-DEE, it should be pronounced LO-DIE, cause the it’s not EE-DOL, it’s EYE-DOL. $%#@#$@#%#$%#$%

FIDGET SPINNERS. ‘Nuff said.

DO IT RIGHT.

Just because you add a letter “O” or “A” or pronounce the word differently an English becomes Tagalog.  We are in a restaurant where all the servers are required to speak in straight Tagalog even calling Coke Zero-Coca Cola Bokya. But, when they gave us complimentary appetizers, the waiter said, “komplimentaryo”.  There’s no such thing.  Just because you added the O to Complimentary, that doesn’t make it tagalog.  And again, where does this whole “hihingi ng sori” when they mean ask for forgiveness thing they keep saying in Pinoy movies???  It should be “hihingi ng tawad”  TAGALOG NA YAN, MALI PA????

That’s all for now…bow.

I have always loved romance novels. From the first Mills & Boon book I borrowed from my lola, I graduated toSweet Valley High, Harlequin to Silhouette Romances . I watch sappy Hallmark Channel movies in my spare time (have over 100 saved on my hard drive). My ipad is filled with happily ever after rom-coms. Maybe this is why, because I never had my dream happy ending, I felt my life was not moving towards “happily ever after”.   And I would forever be hosting my own pity party.

I always thought that by this time in my life I’d be happily married with six children. As I got older and not having found my soulmate, I realize the happily married part might not be for me. And when I had a hysterectomy in 2014 I realized the six children might not be in the cards either. And I cried and I cried and I cried. But then I realize that my life wasn’t so bad.  My sister had cancer! Cancer. And all I had were 3 myomas. So I can’t have kids, but I have nephews and nieces who treated me like a second mom. And I have my Cuervo who is, as I call him, my only child who I spoil rotten. I don’t have a husband or a boyfriend but I have friends to watch movies with, or have coffee or dinners with. I have a family who puts up with all my crap, real or imagined. I have my own home stamped with personal touches in every corner.

This last year was difficult, filled with challenges for me and my family that I never imagined we would face. There are still obstacles ahead of us that we, as a family, are tackling together. But who doesn’t? Really.

I turn 50 this year. And though, thanks to Luminisce and Dr. Kaycee Reyes, I don’t look it (it’s my blog, walang kokontra!!), I will not deny that I am just a few months shy of being a Golden Girl. And perhaps, as I hit my personal milestone, it’s time I to start a new chapter in my life.   This year will be about celebrating the good, letting go of the bad and cherishing every thing and everyone. Tama na ang nega! I have been the victim of a drama I created. So it’s time to devictimize the victim. I will end that story and begin a new one filled with only good things.

This new year is a new 365-page book and it’s up to me to write my own story.  And that story begins today….BOW